story time: one time a guy liked me so much that he kissed me and i had never been kissed before so i screamed and ran away and then he pulled me back and kissed me all over my face and now it’s 3 years later and we’re planning our wedding. so just kiss her for fuck’s sake, you might get a wife out of it. 


yeah so i was at my friends house (im a girl hes a guy) and his parents weren’t home so we broke into his dad booze cabinet and started drinking. we ended up cudding and watching re-runs of full house, and he told me he loved me and i was like your just drunk and he said ‘yeah but im not saying it because im drunk. im saying it as fact, it is 54 degrees outside, the ocean is salty, and i love you’ and i was like dayum son and thats the story of how i lost my virginity.

(Source: itssexualhour)



I told my homecoming date I’m just going to wear sweatpants to the dance and his reaction was ‘okay just let me know what color sweatpants so my tie can match’ 

he’s a keeper.

(Source: kas-a)


In social issues class today our professor held up a black book and was like “this book is red” and we were all “no” and he said “yes it is” and we were just all “that’s not right” and he turned it around and the back cover was red and he said “Don’t tell somebody they’re wrong until you’ve seen things from their point of view”

Story of my fucking life bruh